I Can't Stay Away
by broken87
Summary: AU. After Ryan dumps Marissa, Summer takes her to a club hoping to distract her. But what Marissa ends up finding there will prove to be much more than a mere distraction.
1. Part 1

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**Disclaimer: I don't own any characters from the O.C. I'm strictly borrowing them in order to bring life to my own little world. I also don't own the song "I Can't Stay Away" by the Veronicas.**

**Summary: AU. After Ryan dumps Marissa, Summer takes her to a club hoping to distract her. But what Marissa ends up finding there will prove to be much more than a mere distraction.**

**I Can't Stay Away**

**Part 1**

_This is wrong… This is so wrong…_

That's all that's running through my mind as I once again walk into the club, the same club I've been going to every single weekend for the past couple of months.

_I shouldn't be here_, but I have no control over my body. I was stripped of that ability the first time I stepped foot in this club. I'm drawn to it… I'm drawn to it like a moth to a blinding light. I can't help myself, I just can't stay away…

It all started about three months ago. My boyfriend of nearly two years broke up with me and I was pretty much devastated. After crying on my best friend's shoulder for a while, she insisted we go out and as much as I just wanted to stay home and mope, knowing Summer, she wouldn't give up until I caved, so I didn't bother fighting and simply agreed.

Throughout the ride, she kept talking about the club and how great the shows were. But I didn't pay much attention as she tends to talk a bit too much sometimes. So we arrived at the club and as she's dragging me to the entrance, I glance at the neon lit name and realize the type of club she's taking me to.

"Is this a joke?" I asked in shock.

"What?" Summer asked back.

"Are you seriously taking me to a strip club?"

"It's not a strip club…" Summer replied rolling her eyes, "the dancers keep their bikinis on…"

I remember staring at her. Like I was waiting for her to start laughing and making fun of me for being so gullible to pranks… it never happened…

Rolling her eyes at me again, she linked her arm around mine and pulled me into the club, mumbling something about me being a prude. As we got inside, the first thing I noticed was the abundance of men. There were a few women, but I couldn't be sure if they were customers or employees.

We headed for the bar and Summer didn't hesitate to order a couple of shots right away. I'd usually oppose to shots so early in the evening, but I knew I was going to need them so I chugged mine down without a word.

And while Summer flirted with the bartender, I glanced around the club and instantly noticed the amount of eyes that were on us. The stage was empty, so I guessed the lack of entertainment led to gawking at the only females in the vicinity. Lucky me…

I'd never felt more out of place. Feeling very uncomfortable, I turned back towards the bar just in time to have Summer grab my arm and (literally) drag me towards the stage. And of course, of all the places to sit, she just _had_ to pick the seats directly in front of it.

"Must we really sit here?" I asked, feeling the stares more then ever.

"Lighten up!" Summer exclaimed, "This is gonna be great!"

"Great…" I mumbled before downing half of my drink. _This was gonna be a loooong night_.

Suddenly the lights dimmed lower and a very sensual melody started filling the air. The club was instantly drowned in howls and catcalls as a spotlight focused on a slender leg that sneaked out from behind the curtain. I rolled my eyes at the male's one track mind and took another sip of my drink, wishing this night would just end. But then the curtains were drawn back and everything froze (including the drink I held in mid air I might add).

Now I can assure you that I've never been attracted to girls. NEVER! But this one… this one took my breath away…

She was wearing a very short black skirt with slits up the sides along with a black woman's suit jacket. There was no shirt underneath, just a black bra that peeped out, showing off just how incredibly sexy she was. Adding to the raw look, she wore a black silk tie, a pair of black boots and a black trilby hat. Her long blonde hair was tied up to one side and the black mascara made her blue eyes more distinctive and penetrating than anything I'd ever seen before. She was without a doubt, the most beautiful woman I'd ever laid eyes on.

I can still remember the haze I was in. My throat had gone dry and my jaw hung slack, but my eyes refused to look away from the flawless beauty swaying oh so seductively in front of me.

"You might wanna try breathing" Summer whispered in my ear, making me jump slightly as I'd completely forgotten she was there.

But as I turned my attention to her, no words came out and she simply smirked at me with a raised eyebrow, giving me that "you're so busted" look. Needless to say, I started blushing and not just out of embarrassment for getting caught staring, but at the realization that I was staring at a girl.

Not knowing what to say or how I was supposed to even react, I breathed out in relief as she turned back towards the stage (and of course it didn't take long for me to follow suit). Now I'm sure it must've been my imagination, but I swear she was looking at me. And my embarrassment was forgotten as I simply fell back into that trance.

Halfway into the song, she had taken off her jacket and I had to swallow the lump in my throat as I took note of her exposed torso (that bra and tie left almost nothing to the imagination).

Now what happened next was really stupid and I still feel embarrassed whenever I think about it… So you know how it's completely normal for customers to tip dancers during their routines. I do too. But I was so entranced by her that I managed to completely forget where I was and every time I saw a guy attaching a note to her skirt, boots or (and this one really makes me cringe) bra, I felt my blood boil like never before. I just couldn't take my eyes off her. Every time she glanced my way, I swear my heart skipped a beat.

Then I sensed movement next to me. So I turned just in time to see Summer motioning with her finger for the dancer to come closer. I gulped nervously, wondering what in the world Summer was up to and turned back towards the blonde beauty. I was rendered speechless as I watched her spin gracefully yet provocatively on the pole before landing on her knees and crawling towards Summer. My heart started racing. I watched spellbound as Summer seductively stroked the girl's tie before attaching a rather large bill to her bra strap. I was overtaken by a massive wave of jealousy at Summer's forwardness (or maybe it was just at my lack of confidence), but everything suddenly froze when I heard Summer say, "Come look for us when you're done". _What the hell?! _If I thought I was nervous before, I was a complete train wreck now. But as much as part of me was screaming to get the hell out of there, a bigger part really (and I mean _really!!_) wanted nothing more than another chance to be in the dancer's presence. What scared me though was that I not only _wanted_ to see her, it was almost like I _needed_ to see her. Like my survival depended on it. And it didn't take long to realize how truly addictive she was.

**A/N: I started writing this fic a couple of months ago. It was supposed to be a short story just to help me get over the writer's block I'd been experiencing regarding another story, but it kinda took on a life of its own and I really fell in love with it... I'm currently writing part 10, so if there's any interest, I'll continue posting.**


	2. Part 2

Finalhybrid: Thanks for adding me to your fave authors. You've totally made my day :D and I'm glad you're enjoying this fic as well. Hopefully, I'll do it justice.

Bound Dragon: Thanks. I'm glad you're enjoying it :)

**I Can't Stay Away**

**Part 2**

By the end of her routine, I was hooked. So engrossed was I in everything that was her, that I didn't even register the roaring sound of applause until it started fading away.

"Well…" I heard Summer say, "That was interesting"

"Yeah" I replied softly, "She was good…"

It wasn't until I heard her chuckle that I turned towards her and saw the very amused grin she was wearing. "It wasn't her I was referring to" she stated.

"What're you talking about?" I asked, trying to sound annoyed. But of course, it didn't take a genius to figure out what she was referring to. And to further emphasize my point, she chuckled again.

"I'm talking about you practically drooling over blondie"

"I wasn't drooling!" I exclaimed indignantly (although truthfully, I wouldn't really be surprised if she told me I had in fact been drooling).

"No, thank heavens. That would've meant you were like every single guy in here" she stated while motioning around the club with her hand, "You were _slightly_ more discreet"

Knowing there was no point in arguing, I decided to ask, "Why did you ask her to find us?"

And of course, her grin only widened as she replied, "Don't you want her to?"

I gulped. _What the hell was I supposed to say?_ "I umm…"

"Look Coop, to be honest, I really didn't think you were gonna find anything here. I know you're not the rebound type so I figured you'd just be pissed and complain until we left and I thought that'd be enough to keep your mind off Ryan, at least for tonight… Needless to say, this is much better"

"How so?" I asked meekly. It's not like I didn't know. It's just that this whole thing was still a bit confusing and I needed her to clear it up for me. I mean, what was she expecting me to do?

Summer must've understood as her expression softened while she held my hand affectionately.

"Did you think of Ryan while you were watching her?" she asked, "Tell me you weren't completely captivated by her. That you weren't attracted to her. That you didn't consider the possibilities…"

"Possibilities?!" I asked. _What is she suggesting? _Then it clicked. "YOU WANT ME TO SLEEP WITH HER?!" I asked in shock. It had come out a bit louder than I had meant it to, but what the hell?! She wanted me to sleep with a girl!!

And of course, she chuckled (yet again). "I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do" she said, "I'm just listing your options…"

"Which are?"

"Well, you can loosen up a bit and see where the night takes you _or_ you can go home and mope and never know what could've been…"

She was right. Of course she was right. But still this was new to me on more than one level.

I've never been the one night stand kinda girl. The mere thought of sleeping with someone I've just met appalls me. I mean seriously, think of the risks… So was I really considering changing that for a girl?

"I don't know Summ…"

"Look, she's coming here one way or another, so you might as well take advantage of it. To what extent is completely up to you."

I nodded and nothing else was said. We remained quiet for a while. I guess Summer was giving me time to process everything.

I was finishing my second drink when I heard her say, "I hope you've made up your mind cause here she comes" and surprisingly I managed not to choke. I did however tense up as I slowly turned in my seat. Panic took over me as the reality of the situation kicked in. She was an exotic dancer. A beautiful girl who men craved and didn't mind paying highly for the pleasure of having her company (among other things). Could she see me as anything other than a paying costumer? Would she _want_ to see me as anything else?

But none of these questions were answered as I was suddenly pulled back into reality by a sultry voice saying, "Good evening ladies"

_God I love the sound of her voice…_

"Good evening" Summer purred oh so seductively while crossing one leg over the other, "Glad you could make it"

"My pleasure" she replied as she raised her beer to her lips for a drink, "I must admit you two are a breath of fresh air…"

"Oh really?!" Summer asked teasingly, "Care to elaborate on that?"

"Well… to tell you the truth, I was beginning to get bored by the never-ending amount of testosterone overflowing in here…" she stated matter-of-factly with an innocent shrug, "But you didn't hear it from me" she added with a mischievous grin.

"Well then our lips are sealed" Summer replied with a matching grin.

I had been quiet throughout their whole flirtatious conversation, just shocked by how casual they made the whole thing sound. It was as if this were all a routine. But my ears instantly perked up when Summer asked, "So what's your name?" And at that moment it seemed like the most important question in the world and I waited patiently for her reply.

"Alex" the blonde simply stated.

**A/N: so that's part 2. Although I've already written till part 10, I won't post them all now on account that it would just put waaaaay too much pressure on me lol. BUT, I'm willing to post one more part now... at the right price :P**


	3. Part 3

**I Can't Stay Away**

**Part 3**

_Alex._

The name kept ringing in my ears, echoing louder and louder until everything else faded away and she was once again the only lingering thought on my mind.

_How the hell did she do that? How could someone's presence be so strong as to turn even the most cluttered of minds completely blank??_

But I was once again pulled out of my thoughts, this time by a subtle nudge on the leg from Summer.

"It's a pleasure meeting you Alex. I'm Summer" she said while shaking the blonde's hand. Then motioning towards me (with that ever-present smirk), she added, "And this is Marissa"

I gulped nervously as she turned her attention to me. Everything was happening in slow motion as our eyes locked and I couldn't even recall moving my hand to shake hers. I do remember, however, the sudden shock that enveloped my whole body as I felt her soft skin touch mine. That innocent touch that would soon come to mean the world to me.

"Marissa…" Alex purred softly, "The pleasure is entirely mine" she stated before bringing my hand to her lips and placing the gentlest of kisses on my knuckles.

I remember holding my breath, almost as if breathing would somehow awaken me from this Alex induced haze and bring me back to reality.

Feeling another nudge on my leg (this one a bit harder), I turned to Summer who simply rolled her eyes and stared pointedly to Alex (who by the way was still holding onto my hand).

I felt her thumb gently stroking my knuckles and my ability of speech disappeared as I turned back towards her. Those piercing blue eyes were still locked on mine and it made thinking coherently pretty much impossible.

"I umm…" I let out almost inaudibly. _Get a grip on yourself!_ I remember thinking before finally managing to let out a borderline squeaky, "Hi"

_One syllable words… it's a progress…_

I could feel Summer rolling her eyes again before offering Alex the remaining seat.

_Had she planned this? It did seem rather convenient that she had chosen a table for three people. Not two or four, but three… but then again, I could've just been reading way too much into it… Maybe she wanted the extra seat for her purse… yeah, that's it……… but she always places her purse on the table…_

But with a final stroke over the back of my hand, Alex slowly let it fall and took a seat, leaving me with an odd sense of emptiness as I instantly missed the contact.

I shyly glanced up at her and I must've still been in a haze as she winked at me before turning away to call a waiter.

"Another round of whatever these lovely ladies are having and another beer for me please" she ordered in that charming way of hers. The waiter nodded and with a smile, he left. "So what _are_ two lovely ladies like yourselves doing in a place like this?" she asked.

You could see the wheels turning in Summer's head as she glanced at me with that devious grin of hers. I gave her a pleading look, knowing very well what she was about to do. But Summer being Summer ignored me and turned to Alex saying, "Well Marissa just got dumped and since she wouldn't stop moping over the jackass, I decided she needed a distraction"

"Summer!" I exclaimed, not expecting her to be so blunt.

"What?!" she asked feigning confusion. But before I could say anything, she quickly got up, stating, "Gotta use the ladies' room" and walked away.

_Just kill me now!_ I remember thinking as I covered my face with my hand in utter embarrassment. But before I could freak out trying to figure out what Alex was thinking, another jolt ran through me as I suddenly felt her hand cupping the one I still had placed over the table.

"Your friend's really something" Alex stated with a chuckle.

"I can't believe she said that" I grumbled before taking a deep breath and lowering my hand, "Sometimes I really hate it that she's so forward"

"How long have you known each other?"

"Since forever basically" I replied with a small shrug.

"How about your ex?" she then asked softly.

I glanced at her and the look behind those eyes enthralled me. It compelled me to tell her everything and anything she wanted to know.

"Two years next month" I replied softly.

"I'm sorry" Alex said as she resumed stroking the back of my hand with her thumb.

"It's okay" I replied in a shaky whisper.

Silence took over momentarily as the waiter returned with our drinks. And as he whispered something in Alex's ear, I took a long and much needed sip of mine. When the waiter left, Alex turned back to me.

"So what do you do?" she asked.

"I work in publishing"

"I'm guessing by your lack of enthusiasm that it's not exactly your passion…"

"It's a good job and I'm good at it, but no, it's not my passion"

"So what is?"

"I love drawing! I do freelance work when I can too…"

"Nice… what do you draw?"

"I'll draw anything if it's a job, but I love sketching architecture and scenery"

"Hmm…" she let out softly, twitching her lip slightly, appearing in thought about something, "Could you draw me?" she then asked.

"Sorry?" I asked, unsure if I'd heard correctly.

She smirked. "Could you draw me?"

_Umm… umm… _"I umm… I guess…"

"You guess?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Well I'm not sure I could do you justice" I replied without thinking. But as her brow raised further and I finally realized what I'd said, my cheeks started burning red as I once again covered my face in embarrassment (however this time using the hand she'd been holding).

She chuckled. "Well… I see you're not as shy as you appear to be" she stated teasingly.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to come out that way"

"Don't worry about it. Happens all the time"

"I know…" I whispered, "That's why I'm sorry…'

Her eyes widened slightly and her confident demeanor seemed to falter a bit.

But nothing else was said as Summer chose that moment to return. _Talk about bad timing._

"Am I interrupting anything?" she asked, her scheming mind put on halt temporarily as she clearly noticed the intensity between us.

Neither replied right away. I turned my gaze back down while Alex finished her beer. But as she placed the bottle back on the table, Alex spoke.

"No… we were just talking…"

But the way she had spoken made me turn back towards her and her eyes reflected the same softness and confusion as her tone. But before any conclusion could be made, she pushed her chair back and got up.

"I have to get back to work" she stated, "But it was a pleasure meeting you two"

And with a final lingering glance, she walked away.

"What was that about?" Summer asked.

"Nothing…" I replied as I watched the blonde disappear backstage.

Summer scoffed. "Nothing my a--"

"Can we just go?" I asked weakly, although still managing to cut her off.

"Umm okay… sure Coop…" she replied, obviously taken aback by my sudden somber mood.

And so we left. But never looking back, I failed to see the shadow peeking through the curtains and the blue eyes that followed me out the door.

**A/N: Well that's it for today. Hope you're enjoying it so far :)**


	4. Part 4

Finalhybrid: thanks for the continuous support. Your feedback always puts a smile on my face :)

Bound Dragon: thanks for reading and always leaving a comment :)

madridcc & comedowntome: YAY NEW FANS!! lol. thanks for reading.

**I Can't Stay Away**

**Part 4**

The following week went by in a blur. I don't think I could tell you a single thing that happened, no matter how much I wanted to. I just couldn't focus. All I could think of was Alex.

It was Friday morning and I was sitting in my office. I had a presentation in about an hour, but instead of preparing for it, I'd been staring out the window, mindlessly twirling a pen between my fingers.

_She was so beautiful_, I kept thinking, _and I just had to scare her away…_

But I was brought back to reality when my secretary buzzed in, announcing I had a call waiting.

"Marissa Cooper speaking" I said into the phone, still somewhat in a haze.

"COOP!" Summer squealed on the other end.

"Hey Summer" I greeted while holding the phone slightly away from my ear, "What's up?"

"Do you have plans tonight?"

"Not really. Why?"

"Wanna hit a club?"

"What kind of club?" I asked suspiciously. _There is no way I'm gonna see Alex again._

"Don't worry Coop. I just wanna go dancing… so you up for it?"

"Yeah. Sure" I replied just as my secretary buzzed in again, this time reminding me about the meeting, "Summer, can I call you later? I gotta go."

"Alright. I'll see you tonight then."

"Alright. See you" I replied before hanging up. And with a final glance out the window, I collected my presentation boards and headed to the meeting room.

Surprisingly, the meeting went very well. Even though I haven't got the slightest clue as to what my presentation was about. I guess it's a good thing I'm organized by nature and managed to get the whole thing done ahead of schedule. But how I managed to actually present it is beyond me (not that I'm complaining of course).

After the meeting, I didn't have much to do. So I took the time to draw a bit. I sat facing the window again, sketchpad and pencil in hand and started drawing.

One of the things I love about my office is the view. I'm on one of the upper levels of the building, facing away from the main part of the city, so I get a whole stretch of older architecture that is just beautiful to draw.

But midway through my sketch, I realized I'd started daydreaming and that my attention to detail had stopped being accurate.

Guess where my mind went.

I turned the page over to start a new sketch, this one from memory, and my hand instantly adapted to the different flow of lines and started filling the page with soft curves. When I felt it was finished, I leaned back and was shocked at the outcome. I had drawn Alex (no surprise there), but it was flawless. I was surprised because, normally, I can't draw people without the real model or at least a picture, otherwise the lack of details makes the drawing look flat. But Alex… It was like her image was burned into my mind. So deeply engraved that she felt more real than anyone or anything I'd ever drawn. I could see her every detail, _feel_ every detail…

Later that night, I was at a club with Summer. Now the reason I'm skipping to the evening is because I can't remember the afternoon. I don't remember leaving work. I don't remember going home. I don't remember showering or getting dressed. And I don't remember being picked up by Summer. But I remember the club. I remember it very clearly.

I was actually having fun. The music pulsed through my body and the beat made me sway in perfect sync to whatever the DJ was playing. The rhythm was overpowering and of course, the alcohol helped.

Summer and I just danced, taking turns to playfully spin each other around. But it was during one of these spins that I saw it. Right across from us was Ryan.

I froze as I watched him dancing with some girl. And as they bumped and grinded dangerously close against each other, all I could do was stare and the heartache I'd forgotten throughout the week came rushing back, flooding me once again. I couldn't breathe. It was like being underwater – so deep within the waves where the surface was but a distant memory.

"Coop?" I vaguely heard Summer call behind me, "Marissa, are you okay?"

"Can we get out of here?" I asked weakly.

"Of course" she replied before taking hold of my hand and leading me towards the exit.

No words were spoken as we walked to her car. Only when we got in and Summer put the key in the ignition did she ask, "Do you want me to take you home?"

But I stayed silent. I still hadn't gotten over the shock. One week. That's all it took to move on? It only took one week to get over the two years he spent with me? Was I that easy to get over?

"Coop?" Summer called softly, gently placing her hand on my knee.

"Can we go to the club?" I asked softly.

There was no need to say which one. She already knew.

"Of course" Summer replied just as softly before starting the engine and driving off.

**A/N: Right. So there you go, another chap :) I might post another one later today, but my work load is starting to worry me so... we'll see. Thanks for all the feedback.**


	5. Part 5

**Hey everyone. I'm sooo sorry for taking this long, but I've been dealing with some personal problems. Writing has been hard for me lately, so a huge thanks to everyone who reviewed. **

**Now, I can't guarantee that I'll start posting regularly, but because some of you have actually begged for me to continue, I think it would be very wrong of me not to comply ;)**

**So without further ado, here's...**

**I Can't Stay Away**

**Part 5**

I knew I shouldn't have gone there. I knew I had to stay away. But I couldn't help it. I needed to see Alex. I needed what she did to me.

She was like a drug – one glance and she would pierce through my skin, flow so deeply within my veins that everything else simply faded away. She was the ultimate mirage – an illusion so powerful that made reality disappear. I knew she was the only one that could make me forget…

"Are you sure about this?" Summer asked worriedly.

I nodded and we went in. But the moment we walked in, I was taken aback slightly by the different atmosphere flowing inside. In contrast to the previous week, the show had already begun so the club was already engulfed in that familiar mix of sensual music, howls and catcalls. _Men are so pathetic_.

We made our way to one of few available tables that unfortunately was a bit far from the stage. But on the plus side, it didn't draw too much attention to us when the act ended and a break was announced.

"Would you ladies like a drink?" a waiter asked.

"Hey Mark!" Summer greeted as she recognized the bartender she'd been flirting with last week.

"Nice to see you ladies again" Mark replied with a smile, "What would you like?"

"Surprise us" Summer replied in full flirt mode.

"Just make sure they're strong" I stated without looking at them. I hadn't stopped scanning the club since we sat down.

Mark glanced questioningly at Summer, whose expression instantly soften as she replied, "She's had a bad day" and with an understanding smile, Mark left.

I was starting to lose my nerve. My alcohol buzz from the other club was starting to wear off and although I'd managed to erase Ryan from my thoughts, the idea of seeing Alex again terrified me.

Luckily, Mark returned quickly with our drinks and the moment mine was in front of me, I downed it without a second thought.

"Umm… would you like another one?" Mark asked hesitantly. Both he and Summer had been left slightly slack jawed.

I nodded feeling a bit embarrassed. I really wasn't much of a drinker, but I knew there was no way I'd get through the night sober.

Summer watched Mark walk away before pulling her chair closer to mine.

"Take it easy Coop…" she whispered while placing her hand over mine, "Don't lose yourself because of Ryan" she continued affectionately, "I know it hurts now sweetie, but just give it some time…"

"It's not Ryan" I stated softly, my eyes never leaving the empty glass in front of me.

"Then what is it?" she asked gently.

I stayed silent. I just couldn't say it. I couldn't admit it. Not to her or myself.

But she knew. I know she did. For as long as we've known each other, Summer's always known me better than I've known myself. And this time, it was no different.

"Is this about Alex?" she asked. I remained silent and she had her answer. "What are you thinking?"

"I don't know" I replied almost inaudibly. And I really didn't. I didn't know why I'd asked to go to the club. Apart from wanting to see Alex, I didn't know what I was actually there for. I mean, what did I want to happen?

Just as Summer opened her mouth to speak, a spotlight came back on and once again the stage was bathed in a soft yet alluring light. I felt my heart rate speed up. Even before the music started playing, her presence had already made itself known to me and my senses were once again overpowered by her.

Everything instantly faded away. And as I watched the curtains being pulled back, there was only Alex and I again. She was a vision and I couldn't help but stare. And that night's costume didn't help… at all…

She was wearing incredibly sexy black lace lingerie, complete with garter belts around her upper thighs. As for accessories, she had a thin silver chain hanging loosely around her waist and a pair of beautiful black angel wings on her back. She looked like a Victoria Secret's supermodel on a catwalk – elegant, poised and tempting as hell. She looked absolutely breathtaking and I found myself forgetting about all my worries from earlier. That is… until her eyes met mine.

I gulped. I wasn't expecting her to see us. I mean, our table was practically shadowed from everyone's view… but she did, and her gaze held an intensity too strong for me to handle. So I looked away, turning my gaze downwards to the fresh drink I hadn't realized had been placed there. I focused on my drink for the rest of her routine, gulping it down while sneaking glances at Alex when she was looking elsewhere. But I could always feel her eyes on me and it was overwhelming.

"Are you okay?" Summer asked as she clapped along with the crowd.

"Yeah" I replied shakily before finishing my drink.

Just then a waitress appeared and placed two drinks on our table.

"Sorry" Summer quickly spoke, "We didn't order these"

"Oh I know" the waitress replied with a smile, "They're from Alex" and with that, she left, leaving Summer and I staring curiously at each other.

"Well…" Summer started as she took a sip of her new drink, "That was nice of her"

"I have to use the bathroom" I stated and just as she'd done the previous week, I quickly got up and walked away.

_Breathe,_ I told myself as I stood in front of the mirror. After taking a couple of deep breaths, I turned the cold water on and splashed some on my face. Feeling slightly more relaxed, I dried my face and reapplied my makeup.

_God I feel pathetic_, I thought as I stared at my reflection. Never had I felt that way before. Never had someone affected me with the same intensity as Alex did just by looking at me. It was confusing. It was weird. It was new. And it was scaring the shit out of me.

_Okay… I can do this…_

Another deep breath and I was out of the bathroom. But just as I thought I finally had my nerves under control, I completely lost it again as I approached our table to find Summer just chatting away with none other than Alex.

_Oh my God,_ I thought, _I can't do this…_

But for some reason, my feet kept moving and soon enough, I was standing by the table.

"Coop!" Summer exclaimed, knowing I was probably off in la-la land and needed a wakeup call (_aww bless her_), "Took you long enough" she then added softly.

"Marissa…" Alex whispered sweetly as she stood up, "It's a pleasure seeing you again" she stated as she moved to gently grab my hand and place a kiss on it. She then pulled a chair back and motioned for me to sit down. I did as requested and instantly my eyes found Summer's, which held almost as much confusion as I'm sure she found in mine. Then apparently coming to a decision, she pointed to Alex with her eyes and nudged me on the leg underneath the table.

I grumbled internally before turning to Alex. "Thank you for the drinks" I managed to let out. The fact that I could barely function around her was starting to annoy me. _Just get a grip on yourself!_ I yelled in my head. But it was useless. Even out of costume, she looked absolutely gorgeous.

She had put on a pair of light tight fitting jeans with small tears all over them and the same woman suit jacket she had worn last week (once again just over the bra).

"No problem" Alex replied with a smile, "So…" she then started hesitantly, "How was your week?"

_Is she nervous?_ I noticed she kept biting into her lower lip and kept tugging at a loose strand of hair, habits many people have when dealing with new or uncomfortable situations. But there was no undermining the confidence she oozed in. So why the hell was _she_ nervous?

"Well mine's been great!" Summer stated. I guess she didn't notice Alex's, although subtle, change in demeanor. "I just finished a showcase for Calvin Klein and they were really happy with it" Summer went on. She worked in fashion, organizing showcases and other major events, and she loved it. "I'm hoping to get the meeting with Chanel next week" she added a bit less confidently.

And just as quickly, Alex's demeanor changed back and that charming smile was once again gracing her features.

"Well congratulations" Alex stated, "And I'm sure you'll get it"

"Yeah Summ" I found myself agreeing, "You know you're the best person for the job"

Okay, so I know I can't talk much when I'm around Alex, but I couldn't help but let Summer know how great she was every time she showed the slightest hint of self-doubt. She's always wanted to work in fashion and she's worked very hard to get to where she is now. Plus, I feel I owe her for always (and I do mean always) being there for me.

"Thanks Coop" Summer said softly, her voice full of emotion. She knew what I meant and she knew how proud I was of her. Then dabbing gently at her eyes, she got up saying, "I'm just gonna go touch up my makeup"

I stared at her as she walked away, worrying about how sentimental she was being and wondering if something else had happened. But then she glanced at me over her shoulder and sent me one of her mischievous looks. _Bitch_.

"That was nice of you to say" I heard Alex speak.

I found myself shrugging. "Well it's true" I stated, "She's worked hard and she's great at it! She deserves the best…" I finished in a whisper.

"What about you?" Alex then asked.

"What about me?!" I asked back sounding defensive.

"Umm… how was your week?"

I just stared at her before letting out a silent "Oh" and as I felt the first hint of red surfacing on my cheeks, I added, "Sorry" _Could I be any more pathetic?_

She chuckled then with a shrug, she asked, "So how was it?"

And once again, my mind went blank. _Sigh_. "Umm… I'm sorry… But umm how was what again?"

And to add to my embarrassment, she laughed. "You're just too adorable" she whispered before asking yet again, "Your week… how was it?"

"It was fine" I replied softly, my gaze once again fixed on my drink. I just couldn't look at her. "We published a new writer" I went on just to avoid any further embarrassment (since I was apparently still able to talk about work), "He's really good"

"Good" Alex stated, "So… I see you've taken a liking to this place…" she said with her trademark smirk (which hinted that she knew something she wasn't supposed to know).

"Umm… not really…" I started carefully, "We just didn't have anywhere else to go…"

"But I thought you came here from another club" Alex stated with confusion (which I later found out was very fake).

"Oh… we did…" I stumbled, _I'm going to kill Summer_, "But it got really crowded so we left"

"And you came here?!"

"Well we weren't ready to go home yet" I replied, once again sounding defensive.

"I didn't mean to offend you" Alex stated softly, "I'm just curious as to why you'd choose this place"

"What's wrong with this place?" I asked.

Alex shrugged. "Nothing, I guess… You just don't seem like the type"

"She's not" Summer stated, making her presence known in her favourite way – by humiliating me. "The first time we came here, I had to drag her inside and don't even get me started on the fuss she made about sitting by the stage" she continued with a laugh.

_Just kill me now_. "I'm gonna go flush myself down the toilet" I stated as I got up and walked away once again without making any eye contact with them.

I felt so stupid sitting on the toilet lid. With my face buried in my hands, I started regretting ever coming to the club. Then a soft knock was heard.

"Marissa?" Alex called, "Are you in there?"

_What the hell? She followed me? Why the hell would she follow me?_

"Marissa?" Alex called again.

"What are you doing here?" I finally let out.

"Making sure you don't flush yourself down the toilet" she replied with a chuckle, which only made me burry my face deeper in my hands, "I'm sorry…" she then whispered, "Are you okay?"

"What are you doing here Alex?" I asked again.

"I just wanted to make sure you're alright…"

"Why?" I asked, finally lowering my hands.

She went silent and I saw her feet shifting about through the space underneath the stall door.

"Just open the door Marissa" she then whispered.

There was another moment of silence until I finally did so. She was standing in front of me now, arms crossed over her chest in a defensive manner as she stared deep into my eyes.

"Summer told me about Ryan" she whispered, "She said you saw him at the club tonight"

I nodded and she went on, "She said you asked to come here…"

_I swear I'm going to kill Summer_, ran through my mind as I nodded once again. There was no point in lying at that stage and I was starting to feel overwhelmed by emotions I'd been fighting off.

"You're shaking" Alex stated while lowering her defensive stance.

I couldn't speak. I was biting into my lower lip to stop myself from crying. I'd already made enough of a fool of myself to let her see me crying as well. But the tears kept building and I bit harder into my lip, sure it was going to draw blood soon.

"Oh Marissa" she let out before I felt her arms wrap tentatively around me.

I couldn't hold it in anymore and without even realizing it, I found my arms wrapped around her waist as I finally let my tears fall.

"Shh…" she kept whispering while pulling me closer to her.

_God she feels good_. Never had I felt so safe before.

**To be continued...**

**A/N: ok so there you go. once again thanks for reading and reviewing :)**


	6. Part 6

**I Can't Stay Away**

**Part 6**

We remained that way for a while, arms wrapped tightly around each other, until I finally managed to compose myself. Only then did Alex pull back slightly. Her hands moved to my arms and with a small smile, she slowly trailed them up to my face and carefully wiped my tears away.

"Are you okay?" she asked softly. I nodded. "You wanna talk about it?"

My lips started quivering again. "One week!" I choked out, "That's all it took for him to get over me…" I added softly, "One week… Didn't I mean anything to him?"

"Oh sweetie…" Alex whispered as she leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on my forehead. But as she wrapped her arms around me again, I couldn't help thinking that those kisses were going to be the death of me. "I'm sure you meant the world to him at one point" she went on, oblivious to the effect she had on me, "But people change" she said, pulling away once more, "Feelings change"

_No. Shit_. And for a split second, as I stared hazily into her sapphire eyes, I couldn't remember why I was even crying.

"You still with me?" Alex then asked. Her head was slightly tilted to the side and I realized I'd been staring blankly at her for a while.

I nodded and looked away. With a chuckle, she tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear then gently stroke my cheek with the back of her fingers. _God I love her touch._

"When the time is right…" she whispered.

My gaze instantly turned back to her at that statement only to find her eyes already locked on mine. But just like any good "moment", it just _had_ to be interrupted. This one by the waitress who'd brought us Alex's drinks. _Because she just had to choose that precise moment to walk in. Sigh…_

"Alex!" she exclaimed surprised, "What are you still doing here?" she asked as she made her way to the sink to wash her hands.

"Hey Haley" Alex replied as she casually took a few steps back from me and leaned against the wall, "You getting off?" she asked.

"Yes, thank god! Jeffrey's getting on my last nerve…" Haley answered as she moved to dry her hands, "If he didn't tip as much as he grabs, I would've lost it by now… I mean there's only so much one's ass can take right?"

"I hear ya" Alex replied with a chuckle.

The moment she spoke those words, images of random men grabbing Alex flashed through my mind and I couldn't help the chill that ran down my spine. I shuddered subconsciously and though I barely noticed it, Alex caught its full meaning.

"Haley, this is Marissa" Alex spoke, motioning between the two of us, "Marissa, Haley"

"Hi" I greeted softly.

"Hi" Haley said with a nod, "Glad I got the right table" she added with a playful wink, "Well I'm gonna go. See you next week Alex" and with a final smile, she left.

"You ready to head back to the table?" Alex asked. I nodded and she moved towards the door, holding it open for me with a smile. We headed back towards our table and to my surprise, it was empty. "Guess Summer and Mark are hitting it off nicely" Alex stated from behind me. I turned to her and with a smirk, she motioned towards the bar where Summer and Mark were chatting animatedly away over a couple of drinks. "What do you say we let them be?" Alex asked as she moved towards the table and pulled out a chair for me. I nodded and as she helped me push my chair in, she lowered her lips to my ear and whispered, "This way I can have you all to myself" before taking her own seat.

My breath caught in my throat, but I somehow managed a shy smile. She smiled back, but before anything could be said, a middle aged man approached us.

"Good evening ladies" he greeted with what I'm guessing was his best attempt at a charming smile, which in his drunken state came off as nothing short of perverted.

"Mr. Jeffrey, how lovely to see you again" Alex replied, "Did you enjoy the show?"

Mr. Jeffrey's smile widened (making him look even more perverted) as he raised the two glasses he'd been holding before placing one down on the table in front of Alex.

"As always Miss Lexie" he replied, "But you know you're my favourite" he added and I felt my stomach churn with nausea.

"You're such a sweet talker Mr. Jeffrey" Alex stated in her never-ending charming manner.

Obviously pleased with her response, Mr. Jeffrey seemed to ponder his options before boldly deciding to take the plunge and asking if he could "borrow" her for a while.

I wasn't sure what to expect at that point, but I was shocked when Alex replied, "I'm sorry Mr. Jeffrey, but I'm off duty and I promised my friend here that we would catch up"

"Oh" he let out visibly disappointed, "Maybe some other time then" he added as he glanced at me, I'm guessing wishing I'd disappear, "Well have a pleasant evening" he stated before walking away.

"Sorry about that" Alex whispered as she took a small sip of her drink. A soft sigh escaped her lips and I couldn't help noticing that her confident demeanor faltered (although more visibly) yet again. I didn't know what to say so I just nodded. She glanced at me from the corner of her eye before placing the glass down and turning fully towards me. I gulped. Somehow having her full attention made me nervous. But before she could say anything, both our attentions were diverted as someone cleared their throat next to us. We both turned to see yet another middle aged man (this one seeming more sophisticated) with two glasses perfectly held in one hand and a smirk on his handsome face. And at this point I wasn't surprised when Alex's demeanor changed back to what I later came to call her "professional" manner. My only surprise at this point was at how fast and almost automatically she changed from one to the other.

"Mr. Clark, what a pleasure seeing you again" she stated.

"The pleasure, Lexie, is entirely mine" he replied in his deep voice as he reached for her hand and placed a delicate kiss on it. Then with her hand still in his, he raised an eyebrow and made an obvious show of checking her out before adding, "And might I say that if possible, you look more radiant than ever"

"Always the charmer Mr. Clark" Alex replied while slowly withdrawing her hand.

"I try" he replied with a short bow of his head, "May I offer you a drink?" he then asked.

And at that point, the nausea I'd felt with Mr. Jeffrey was materializing into actual bile in my stomach.

"That's sweet of you, Mr. Clark, but I'm already set" Alex replied while holding up her glass to emphasize her point.

"Oh well…" he mumbled before glancing over at me and adding, "In that case, I'm sure your friend could use one" as he placed one of the glasses in front of me, "Ain't that right babe?" he asked with a wink. I faked a smile but remained as I was – leaning back on the chair with my arms crossed over my chest. He seemed unfazed by my attitude and simply turned his attention back to Alex. "So Lexie… can I persuade you to spend the night with me?"

_Fuck this,_ I thought as I reached for the glass and gulped down its contents. I was just about ready to bolt again, but running off to the bathroom twice in one night seemed more than enough, so I grudgingly remained seated.

"I'm sorry Mr. Clark, but I've already made plans to catch up with my friend" Alex replied.

Mr. Clark glanced at me before suggesting, "Well I'm sure your friend won't mind rescheduling…"

_It's official. I'm definitely off men._

Alex chuckled and to my surprise, I felt her fingers gently running up and down my arm. "She's not that kind of friend Mr. Clark…" she stated in a very seductive voice.

And of course, at that point, Mr. Clark's thoughts turned towards one thing. "I don't suppose I could join you ladies?" he asked with the typical male perverted grin.

_That's it,_ I thought, _I'm gonna puke._

But Alex just chuckled again while raising her glass to her lips and taking a sip. "Sorry Mr. Clark…" she stated, "She doesn't like to share…"

And as Mr. Clark looked at me with puppy dog eyes, all I could think of was if Alex used this excuse every time a client wanted to sleep with her or if I was an exception. _Doubtful._

But seeing that I wasn't going to indulge his fantasy, Mr. Clark reluctantly gave up and walked away.

"He's a stubborn one that Mr. Clark…" Alex stated softly, "I owe you one" she added while resuming gently stroking my arm. I pulled my arm away and her demeanor instantly changed again. "What's wrong?" she asked worriedly.

I remained silent for a while, refusing to meet her gaze. This night was proving to be all too much and I just had to get out of there. "I can't do this" I whispered.

She sat up straight and reached for my hand, which I pulled away again. "Have I done something wrong?" she asked softly.

Her voice sounded almost scared and I couldn't resist looking back at her. "I'm sorry" I said as I pushed my chair back and stood up, "I thought I could handle this, but I can't…"

"Marissa" she called as I turned to leave, "Please don't go…"

I turned back to her and forced a small smile. "Goodbye Alex" and with that, I rushed towards the exit, with Summer following close behind.

**To be continued...**


	7. Part 7

**I Can't Stay Away**

**Part 7**

By the following week, my stress levels were at an all-time high. I'd been bombarded with work at the publishing house along with a couple of side jobs for an amateur architect who needed help at an "affordable" price. But I wasn't complaining. A busy week for me only meant a better pay and I for one would never object to that. And as a further bonus, it kept my mind distracted. Specifically from anything regarding a certain blonde dancer.

But when Friday had come and gone, I was completely exhausted and all I wanted to do was to go back to my apartment and have a good night's sleep. However, I still had some work to get done over the weekend, so on Saturday I decided to spend my morning at a small coffee shop. It was somewhat hidden near the docks, but it was cozy and quiet and the perfect place to work outside of the house.

The little doorbell jingled as I walked inside and I made my way to a small booth near a window that faced the sea. It was a beautiful sight and I instantly felt inspired.

"What can I get you love?" a middle-aged waitress asked with a motherly smile.

"A cup of coffee and some pancakes would be great thanks" I replied cheerfully before pulling out a stack of folders from my messenger bag and setting them on the table.

"Busy day dear?" the waitress asked as she finished scribbling down my order.

"Oh umm yes" I replied hesitantly, "Is that okay?"

"Of course dear, go right ahead" she replied sweetly, "I'll be back shortly with your order"

When I'd long ago finished my breakfast and my second cup of coffee was at its end, I realized my mind had started drifting. I'd been rereading the same paragraph for the umpteenth time and the last note I had taken had been over an hour ago.

"Shit" I whispered frustratingly as I leaned back on the seat. I then glanced out the window and the view instantly made me smile. Thinking maybe all I needed was a break, I reached for my sketchpad and opened it to a random page. _Big mistake._ My breath caught in my throat as I stared at the portrait I'd drawn of Alex. I'd almost forgotten about it. My week had been too busy and I hadn't found any time to draw since that morning in my office. So much for my distraction.

_God she's beautiful_, I remember thinking with a sigh as I carefully traced her features with my fingertips. My desire to draw had vanished as I was once again injected with the vision of Alex. Suddenly the black and white sketch didn't feel right, didn't seem real enough, and I found myself digging inside my bag for a set of colours. I could still see her clearly. My mind had once again gone blank of everything but Alex… Then the drug subsided and I awoke from my haze to stare at a colored version of her. Her blonde hair as bright as the sun, her blue eyes as deep as the ocean and her pink lips as enchanting as a blossoming rose. She was beyond beautiful and I found myself thinking, _What the hell am I doing?_

The jingle of the doorbell brought me out of my thoughts and for some reason, my gaze turned to the door. _Mistake number two_.

"Good morning Alex" the waitress greeted, "What can I get you today?"

"Morning Gabby" Alex replied as she approached the bar and took a seat, "I'll just have coffee please"

"Just coffee?! Now don't you start going off to work on an empty stomach"

Alex chuckled. "It's still early Gabby. I'll eat later"

"You make sure of that" Gabby warned as she turned to fix her coffee.

Alex chuckled again as she spun the seat around and leaned her elbows on the counter. As she casually scanned the coffee shop, I could feel my heart start racing, beating rapidly against my chest. The conflict between reason and emotion resurfaced as I debated whether or not I wanted her to see me. But unfortunately (or not) the choice wasn't mine and soon enough, I found Alex's blue eyes staring at me.

Neither one spoke right away. We just stared at each other, silently deciding if anything should be said at all. I wanted to look away. After having left the club last week, I wanted to make it clear that I hadn't changed my mind, but there was something about Alex that forced my eyes to remain on hers. I'm still not completely sure of what it was, but it was almost like I could feel Alex fighting between her two personas. I could feel her inner turmoil and it both scared and intrigued me just like everything else about her so far.

But then she moved off the seat and started walking towards my booth. I sat up straight in panic and swallowed the lump that had suddenly formed in my throat. Not a single coherent thought crossed my mind and my breathing was becoming increasingly ragged. Then my gaze fell on my sketchpad and my eyes widened as I scrambled to get it closed and thrown back into my bag a mere breath before she came to a halt in front of me.

"Hi" she greeted shyly.

"Hi" I greeted back, my expression blank.

It was awkward. It was _very_ awkward. And it was perfectly clear in the way she kept shifting her weight on her feet and fidgeting with her fingers. She kept glancing at the empty seat while biting into her lip and I had to bite into mine in order not to give in to the temptation of offering it to her.

_There's no way I'm letting her get to me, _I thought.

"Do you mind if I join you?" Alex asked tentatively.

"Sure" I replied, _Damn it!_

She took a seat and silence enveloped us. An awkward silence. I don't know what it was, but the air felt different that morning. For some reason, I felt more self-confident and less like the mumbling fool I'd previously been around Alex. Alex on the other hand kept fidgeting and could barely maintain eye contact with me. I had to swallow a giggle at the obvious relief in her expression when Gabby made her way over with her coffee. She was completely adorable, but I quickly swallowed that thought as well as I was determined to keep up my rigid charade.

"So how've you been?" Alex asked shyly.

"Good" I replied shortly, "Busy"

"I can see that" she stated, her gaze falling onto the stack of files on the table. She seemed to be pondering what to say next. Her mouth would open slightly as if to talk, but just as quickly she'd close it and take a sip of her coffee.

"Listen" I found myself saying, causing Alex to look me in the eye, "I don't mean to sound rude, but I've got a lot of work to do"

Did I want Alex to leave? Of course not! Work was the farthest thing from my mind at the time. But this new side of Alex was driving me crazy! I didn't know what to make of this shy and utterly adorable side of her and I just couldn't risk losing my sudden developed self-control over it.

However, it seemed like fate had chosen to test me that morning and not a second after I spoke, the cutest thing happened. Alex blushed.

_What the hell?!_

"I'm sorry" she stated, "I didn't mean… I mean… I didn't…" she stuttered and it took all I got to keep my jaw from falling, "I just… I just wanted to apologize about the other night at the club" she finally got out in a whisper, "I never meant to make you uncomfortable"

"Okay" I replied. It was totally lame, but it was all I could manage in my current state of shock. I mean seriously, what happened to the seductress I met at the club two weeks ago?

"Okay" Alex whispered back, "So umm I'm gonna go… let you get back to your work… and umm hopefully I'll see you around" and with a small smile, she left.

I watched her go. And when she left the coffee shop, I looked out the window and continued watching her walk away.

_This is getting weird._

**To be continued...**


	8. Part 8

**Hey everyone. I apologize for the long wait / hopefully there's still interest in this. So without further ado, here's:**

**I Can't Stay Away**

**Part 8**

I didn't know what to do. Hours had passed since Alex had left the coffee shop and I was still sitting there, desperately trying to get some work done. But it was fruitless. As I tried going over the endless pages on a project due on Monday, all I could see was Alex. No word would register in my brain. No letter seemed recognizable… no letter except for four that spelled out the one name I desperately needed to erase.

A-L-E-X.

_Argh! _I furiously yelled at myself,_ Get her out of my head!_ Yet her image burned just as fiercely as ever, spreading like flames into every corner of my mind. I couldn't take it. It was too much.

When I finally came to terms with the fact that I wasn't going to get any work done, I paid the bill and left. And for the next couple of hours I just wandered aimlessly around, blinded by an endless cloud of confusion. If felt weird. You see, I'm used to being focused, in control. Ever since I nearly O.D.ed in High School, I've turned my life around. I started planning my future and worked hard, never letting anything get in the way of my goals. Even when I started dating Ryan, the "honeymoon" phase (as amazing as it was) never led me astray from that path. I was just _that_ focused. And I still _am_ that focused! I'm focused by nature! Then how the hell did I end up at the beach when I should've been at home working?

_This is ridiculous…_

I'd left the coffee shop nearly six hours ago and yet I was still walking around in a junkie haze. Alex was proving to be more than a drug. One which gave me no say whatsoever before getting my first hit…

Luckily on Sunday, reason made itself known again and I was back to panicking over the amount of work I had to get done. My coffee machine had been on duty all day and every single occasional thought of Alex was tossed away. I worked all bloody day, basically nonstop. Honestly, I barely recall eating. It was three a.m. when the last file was finally saved onto my memory stick and I was thoroughly exhausted. But with a pleased smile at getting the job done, I eagerly headed to bed.

But my few hours of peaceful sleep were broken by a hectic Monday morning as halfway through my morning coffee and over an hour before having to leave for work, I was already dashing out of my apartment. I hastily made my way to a printing shop near the office (which thankfully was empty) and quickly sat myself in front of the first computer in sight. After loading and checking all my work, I made my way to the counter.

"Excuse me" I called out.

"Just a minute" someone replied from the back.

I glanced at my watched and took a deep breath. _It's okay_, I thought, _I've still got time_.

"How can I help you?" the same voice spoke and my eyes eagerly shot up only to meet with those of…

"Alex?" I asked in shock, my work temporarily forgotten.

She simply smiled at me. "How can I help you Marissa?" she asked.

My jaw had dropped slightly, but I quickly caught it as we walked back to the computer. I told her how I wanted my work printed before glancing at my watch and nervously asking, "How long will this take?"

"I can do it right now so twenty minutes tops" she replied, her gaze still on the screen as she set up the printing options. When she was done, she pulled out my memory stick and handed it to me before moving back behind the counter.

The shop weighted heavily of silence, the only sound being the soft purr of the printers. I kept shifting my gaze from my watch to the floor to the ceiling to the printers and finally to Alex. This wasn't helping at all. It seemed like every time I saw Alex, the mystery that was her only got more cryptic.

"Here we go" she then stated, placing my work on the counter and bringing me out my thoughts, "They're really good" she added as I looked over the printouts.

"Thanks" I replied as I stole a shy glance at her.

We hadn't spoken much in the thirty minutes I'd been there and by the time I was paying, I could tell she was struggling to say something. We both were really.

As she handed me my change, I could feel her eyes on me and it took all I had to focus on putting the money in my wallet.

"Would you like to grab a coffee sometime?" she then asked and the distinct _ploff_ of coins falling on the carpeted floor rang loudly in my ears.

She had asked it very softly and very quickly, but I'd heard her perfectly. My breath caught in my throat and it took me a minute to regain my composure. Then smiling sheepishly at her, I bent down and started picking up my coins. I tried hurrying up when I heard the counter door open and held my breath as I saw her kneeling in front of me.

"I'm sorry" she whispered as she picked up the last few coins and handed them to me while looking at the floor. I didn't reply. "It seems all I do is make you uncomfortable" she added as we both stood back up.

I still didn't reply. I just remained quiet as I put away my wallet and started placing the printouts in my presentation folio while she moved back behind the counter equally as quiet. But this felt silly.

_I mean seriously, what's wrong with having a cup of coffee?_ I thought as I finished keeping my things.

Glancing at my watch once again, I realized I had to get going. So I picked up my things and looked up at Alex and as I laid eyes on her adorable bashful expression, I knew I couldn't leave without saying something first.

"Alex" I started (and I couldn't help the smile on my face as she tentatively looked up at me), "I'm sorry. I don't know why I act the way I do with you… you just… confuse me and I'm not used to that…"

"I didn't mean to…"

"-Let me finish" I cut her off softly, "I don't know what's going on between us… but I'd really like to find out where it takes me… or us…"

"Umm…" Alex let out. She was slightly wide-eyed and slacked-jawed, but it was cute seeing her take over my initial role. "Does that mean…?"

I just had to smile. "Would you like to have dinner with me tonight?"

**A/N: So that's part 8. I've got part 9 ready if anyone wants it ;) let me know what you think and how you think it's going. thanks to everyone who takes time to leave feedback and thanks for reading :)**


	9. Part 9

**I Can't Stay Away**

**Part 9**

I left the shop with a huge smile plastered on my face and I knew it was going to be a great day. When I reached my office, there was a hot cup of coffee waiting for me along with the contract that sealed a deal I'd been working on for weeks. How could I not smile? During my lunch break, I met the architect I was working for and presented my idea. I got the thumbs up and a free lunch. My day was going great…

Then the day was over and a thought popped into my head as I made my way home:

_I'm having dinner with Alex._

It hadn't really registered before and I suddenly felt panic breaking through my smiling streak.

_I'm going on a date with a girl!_

Apparently, that hadn't occurred to me when I had asked her out. But I _had_ asked her out and I didn't regret it. I knew it was what I wanted ever since I first laid eyes on her. And as I reached my apartment and dropped my stuff on the counter, a different panic took over.

_What am I gonna wear??_

Loud thuds and annoyed groans filled my apartment as I tossed my shoes off and struggled to get undressed. By the time I reached the bathroom, I had to rub my arms as I'd hit several walls in my clumsy attempt to speed things up. After a very quick shower, I rushed to my room wrapped in a towel and tore the wardrobe's doors open. Now I've always loved my extensive collection of clothing, but at that moment, I completely despised having so much choice. And after going through most of the clothes I owned (and leaving a huge mess on the floor and bed), I finally settled on the short denim skirt and pale pink button up shirt I'd already taken out on my third try over an hour ago. But as I ran back to the bathroom to apply my makeup, I caught a glimpse of the clock and rushed through the process of applying eyeliner and mascara (nearly poking my eyes out), always keeping in mind that:

_Shit! I'm late!_

I made it to the restaurant completely out of breath and quickly scanned the area for Alex. The moment I found her, my breath caught in my throat all over again. She was easily the most attractive person I'd ever seen, even in those worn-out jeans and black leather jacket, casually leaning against the wall with a serious look on her face. I was tempted to just stand there and watch her all night, but as I saw her glancing at her watch, I didn't even need to tell my feet to move and soon enough, I was standing in front of her.

A smile instantly broke through her somber features and I felt a pull at my heart knowing I was the cause of that smile. But then remembering I had kept her waiting, I instantly got reacquainted with my high school rambling mode. _Sigh._

"I'm so sorry I'm late" I started, "I left the office late and I had to rush home where I pretty much ran into every single wall on the way to the bathroom for the quickest shower in history only to take an eternity digging through my closet for something to wear before practically running all the way here but not really cause you can't really run in a skirt and -"

And then I stopped as I realized I had rambled my way into yet another embarrassing situation. At least now I knew I didn't need Summer to experience them. My cheeks started burning red and I couldn't help slapping my hand over my face.

_Now when has this happened before? Oh yes… WITH ALEX!!_

So I groaned as I waited for the chuckle that always followed… only it never came. Instead, I felt her taking my hand and lowering it so that our hands hung loosely at our sides.

"Doesn't matter" Alex stated, "I'm just glad you didn't change your mind" she added softly, her gaze lowering to our hands as she shyly stroke the back of mine with her thumb.

"I wouldn't do that" I whispered while tightening the hold on her hand to show that I meant it.

And she smiled. That beautiful smile that gave me butterflies all over. I couldn't help but smile back.

"So…" Alex spoke, "Are you hungry?"

Right on cue, my stomach started grumbling. "Starving" I replied.

She laughed and led me inside. We were directed towards a table and I took the opportunity to take in this new surrounding. The restaurant was quite quaint and cozy and it didn't seem to appeal to the richer crowd. I guess that's why Alex chose it. It was the perfect place for us to get to know each other without any interruptions.

"So ladies, what will it be?" a waiter asked, pen and pad in hand.

I caught Alex's eyes and shrugged, requesting that she order for us. She gave me a small nod and after a quick scan of the menu, she turned to the waiter and started listing a couple of dishes I'd never heard of before. The waiter double checked the order and walked away, leaving us sitting there awkwardly.

Fortunately, when he returned with our food, conversation started flowing more easily. Alex asked about my designs and I told her about my lunch with Brandon, the architect. She then told me that the print shop she worked at belonged to a friend of hers who was an artist as well. We talked about our pasts, sharing childhood stories about family and friends until the waiter came over with the check.

We both reached for it at the same time and our hands grazed, sending sparks of electricity flying all over the place. I'd never felt anything like it.

"Let me" we both spoke at the same time. Our eyes met and I swear you could cut through the intensity with a knife.

"I called you out Alex" I stated while reaching for the bill again.

"I know" she replied with a light shrug, "But I insist" she added as she took my hand, placed it to the side on the table and paid the bill.

"So I got a free lunch _and_ dinner… who said there's no such thing as a free meal?" I kidded.

"Who said it was free?" Alex asked teasingly.

I couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at her. "Oh?" I let out as I leaned forward on the table, "And what do you have in mind for payment?"

"Just your company" Alex stated softly, taking me by surprise.

I just stared at her, mouth slightly agape. I just couldn't believe this was the Alex I met at the club.

She started blushing and looked down at the table for a minute before looking me in the eye again with that shy smile of hers that always made me melt.

When we left the restaurant, we stood outside rather awkwardly. I didn't want the night to end yet and I was pretty sure she didn't either. But we just stood there and I just kept glancing around, probing my brain for a way to go about it.

"Are you in the mood for the beach?" Alex asked.

I could only smile.

So we headed down to the beach and the conversation started flowing again while we walked barefoot along the seashore. We talked about past relationships. I told her about Ryan and she told me about Lacey, the ex who treated her as nothing more than a stripper. At that point I just couldn't contain myself any longer. I had to ask, "Why do you do it?"

She merely shrugged, her eyes tracing the rippling water. "Same reasons you do publishing" she replied softly, "It pays the rent"

I nodded. What else could I say? She'd already told me she never finished school. When her parents found out she was gay, they kicked her out and she had to drop out. Years later, it was still a struggle for survival. So what else could I say? Nothing. We just kept walking in silence, reveling in the moment we had in hand. When it started getting late and the evening breeze picked up, Alex offered to walk me home.

"This is me" I stated when we reached my apartment building.

She nodded, biting into her lip nervously before shyly asking, "Can I see you again?"

I couldn't help biting into mine as I tried containing my excitement. I reached into my purse and pulled out a business card. "Call me" I whispered as I handed it to her. As she took it, our fingers grazed again and I felt a chill go up my spine. Then my breath caught as she leaned forward to place a delicate kiss on my cheek. I felt my heart melt as her lips lingered on my skin, igniting sparks all over my body. It was like being at the beach on a warm summer day. When the sun's kissing your skin and its warmth envelops you with a golden glow… Then she pulled back and I instantly felt cold.

"Goodnight" she whispered.

"Goodnight"

**A/N: hey everyone. thanks soo much for the awesome feedback. it really puts a smile on my face :) however, i have to say that this will be the last from me for a while. uni just started back up again and i haven't been really inspired lately... but... i am starting short story writing as an elective, so hopefully it'll draw back my muse. till then, i'd just like to say a huge thank you to everyone who supported this fic and i will state that i am NOT giving up on it. **


	10. Part 10

A/N: Hey guys. Sorry for the wait. I had part 10 done a while ago, but I completely forgot to post it here / anyway... this is as far as I've gone with this story and I won't have time to write for it until I finish the semester. Hopefully I'll get the next part done before xmas :P but without further ado, here's:

**I Can't Stay Away**

**Part 10**

I was on cloud nine all through the following morning. I couldn't believe I'd been so nervous to go out with Alex. The date had been so enjoyable and Alex had been a complete sweetheart. I have no idea why I'd never consider dating girls. I mean seriously, this one date with Alex (apart from the occasional awkward moment) was by far the best date I'd ever been on and without a doubt, the most exciting, terrifying and nerve-wracking one as well (all in a good way, of course). I just couldn't stop thinking about it... and Alex.

_Alex…_

Then the phone rang.

"Marissa Cooper" I answered distractedly.

"Coop!" was the replied shriek.

_Gotta love Summer's greetings, _I thought, "Hey Summ, what's up?"

"What the hell Coop?!" she scolded, "You never called me last night and I'm dying to know how your date with Alex went"

"It went well" I replied simply, knowing full well that I was torturing her. Summer had gone silent and I grinned as I envisioned her state of shock.

"COOP!!"

And as Summer went on with her ramble on how I was failing in my best friend's duties of filling her in on how my date had gone, I just sat there smiling, staring out my window as I dreamily twisted the phone cord around my fingers.

"Are you even listening to me?" she scolded as I'd neglected to answer any of her questions.

I chuckled. "Sorry Summ"

"Coop…" she whined, "How can I be supportive of you and Alex if you don't tell me anything?"

I chuckled again. "How about we meet for lunch? We can talk then"

"And you'll fill me in?" she asked and I couldn't help comparing her to a child asking her mom for an ice-cream cone. I could even envision her puppy dog eyes.

"Yes Summ" I replied with a roll of the eyes, "Every last detail"

That phone call was the most excitement I got for a while, I later attended a meeting in which various new accounts were discussed, but as my work load was already exceeding the norm, I spent most (if not all) of it daydreaming about… well you know what (or should I say _who_?). After the meeting ended, I was back in my office, flipping through random files in hopes of making time pass quicker. I still had another hour before my lunch break and I was getting impatient.

"What's wrong with me?" I asked aloud as I realized just how impatient I truly was.

This wasn't like me. It wasn't like me to just sit around during work hours. I should've been reviewing covers for the fiction series that would be published in two weeks. I should've been editing and selecting reviews. I should've been reading the manuscript to the story I was illustrating. Even the job for Brandon still needed a lot of work done.

_So why the hell am I just sitting around doing nothing?_, I yelled in my head.

"Miss Cooper, you have a call waiting on line one" my secretary informed me.

I tried keeping my frustration at bay as I picked up the receiver.

"Marissa Cooper"

Silence greeted me for a moment before a soft voice finally said, "Hi"

_Need I say who it was?_

"Hi" I softly greeted back. My frustration was long forgotten and a smile instantly made itself known.

"Is this a bad time? I can call later if you –"

"No, I'm not busy" I gently cut her off.

I could hear her voice wavering with nerves and my smile widened as butterflies once again took claim of my stomach.

"Good" she whispered shyly, "I wasn't sure if I could call so soon, but umm… I umm… I'm short of plans for tonight and I was wondering if you wanted to umm… go watch a movie or something?"

I don't think my smile could get any bigger. "I'd love to"

Then came lunch with Summer. She finally got her gossip as I told her all about the date, no detail left out (obviously not my choice, but Summer easily picks up if I leave something out, no matter how tiny). The positive side to this was that I got to talk about Alex, but unfortunately, Summer took up most of my lunch hour boasting that it was only thanks to her that I'd even met Alex.

"You owe me" she stated matter-of-factly with a huge grin on her face.

"Whatever" I replied. Of course I was internally grateful that Summer had taken me to that club, but there was no need to boost her ego.

"So when are you seeing her again?" she then asked.

"Tonight. We're going to watch a movie" I replied. And for some reason, her grin turned mischievous, reminding me of that night at the club. "What?" I asked annoyed.

"Nothing" she replied with an innocent shrug, "Just picturing you and Alex in a movie theatre" she paused, waiting for a reaction. I just raised an eyebrow. "Alone in a dark and cozy movie theatre"

I could only roll my eyes.

That evening, I was a lot more relaxed. I'd easily picked out my clothes, there had been no accidents regarding walls or make-up and I had more than enough time to walk to the theatre.

Alex was already there, once again leaning against the wall. Only this time, there were no nervous glances at the watch. Instead, a dreamy smile graced her beautiful face and I couldn't help matching it as I caught the sparkle in her eyes the moment they locked with mine.

"Hey you" she greeted warmly. I replied and we headed inside.

There wasn't much fuss over which movie we wanted to watch, but getting the tickets took longer as we were both adamant with paying. I won that argument, insisting that it was in fact my turn to treat as she'd already paid for dinner.

"Fine" she replied with a pout, to which I couldn't help but chuckle.

_So cute_, I thought, "You can pay for the snacks if you want to" I said with a playful wink.

She blushed slightly but said nothing and we walked towards the snack bar. We then made our way into the theatre and sat in the middle seats towards the back. As the trailers played continuously on the screen, I felt a sudden urge to look at Alex and I wasn't disappointed when she was looking back at me. This felt nice, comfortable, and I easily settled into my seat as the movie started rolling. The bucket of popcorn sat between us and as I laughed at the main character's clumsiness, I reached into the bucket at the same time as Alex. The laughter instantly vanished and the screen went pitch black. My breath caught in my throat and my eyes shyly trailed down to our hands. They were barely touching, just frozen within the tight confines of the bucket. Neither dared to move. I bit my lip and my pinky twitched. Our hands were merely grazing, but I could feel the full effect of her touch and I desperately craved for more. I took a deep breath and placed a shy hand over hers. _God she feels good_, I couldn't help thinking. But then Alex moved our hands onto the armrest between us and interlaced out fingers, and I just couldn't contain the smile from breaking through. I sneaked a glance at her and saw her smiling, and it completely warmed me up inside.

When the movie ended, we remained seated. The room was getting empty, but I didn't want to leave. I didn't want to let go of her hand.

"Let's go?" Alex asked, giving my hand a gentle squeeze.

My heart dropped and I glanced at our hands, but I nodded and got up. She followed, letting go of my hand, and picked up the empty bucket of popcorn.

_What's the big deal?_ I asked myself as we walked out of the theatre, I was getting frustrated with myself for feeling so down at the loss of contact, _I can just reach for her hand again, _I thought. But I knew I wouldn't. I knew I didn't have the guts for such a bold move. I mean, it was nice having her hold my hand while we were in the dark theatre, but was I really ready for such a public display of affection?

But then her hand slipped back into mine, and all my thoughts vanished except for how right it felt. I found myself interlacing our fingers and she glanced at me with a smile.

**Thoughts?? Comments??**


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